PETA is After the Groundhog's Job

Grab your guns groundhogs! PETA and its followers have officially lost their minds. They're trying to take your job.

I read an article today that explained how PETA wants to give your job to... no not illegal immigrants.... but to a robot because they think you get too "stressed."

Are you kidding me? I mean... common, seriously?

That groundhog is treated better than most kids! Hey, don't get mad at me, I didn't say it. William Deeley, president of the Inner Circle of the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club, says the animal is kept in a climate-controlled environment and is "being treated treated better than the average child in Pennsylvania."

PETA's letter to Mr. Deeley compares using animatronic groundhogs for Groundhog Day to using animatronic dinosaurs in the "Walking With Dinosaurs, the Live Experience." There is one small flaw in their logic: dinosaurs have been dead for 65 million years! And I'm sure if dinosaurs were still alive, someone would have found a way to put too much "stress" on them too. But then again, I might have something else to write about.

So keep up the good work PETA, I can say I was entertained. Probably not the desired effect you were looking for, was it?

Here is a link to the whole article and the letter from PETA.

A Teleprompter for Elementary Schoolers?

President Obama uses a teleprompter during a speech at a Grand Road Elementary school.

Seriously? They're in elementary school! Its official, President Obama is just a talking head:

Did you notice the whistles? How would you like to be the guy with the job title of Obama's teleprompter-setter-upper? I bet that guy isn't worried about his job during the struggling economy.

End of the Year Road Trip to The Villages

At the end of 2009, my mom and I took a road trip to see Grandpa-Pete and Nana at their new home in The Villages.

I've finally gotten around to creating a photo album which you can see by clicking here.

Listen, I Don't Work for the Government!

As I was going through the normal ritual of fighting with the pay-at-the-pump... gas pump... at the gas station. <-- Wow, too many of the same words in the same sentence. I'm starting to confuse myself.

Let's try that again... As I was fighting a gas pump from 1983, I was reminded of why I hated going to that gas station. First of all because none of the pumps can read my card. I always have to go "see cashier," completely defeating the purpose of having the pay-at-the-pump option.

If that weren't bad enough, I had to play my favorite gas station game. I'm sure you've played it before, the guess how much gas it will take to fill my tank game! "Okay, I know I wasn't completely empty. And I think my car holds 11 gallons... or is it 13? Wait, or is it the Car-on-Call that holds 11 gallons?

You know about the Car-on-Call, right? The Car-on-Call is a term I've given the crappy car you have to drive when yours is in the shop...because you never know when yours will decide, "Hey, it's been a while since I've been to the repair shop. I think I'll blow a gasket." Common, everyone has a Car-on-Call... or is that just a Roach Family thing?

Anyway back to the story, I was playing my favorite gas station game and decided instead of trying to figure out how many possible gallons my car needed... and then multiplying by the current price of gas... I just took the easy way out and told Mr. Patel to ring me up for $20.00.

As I walked back to my car, I remembered another amusing tale of when I was at th exact same gas station, following the exact same orders. "Please see cashier." Only this time I got into a conversation with Mr. Patel about the shirt I was wearing.

I was wearing one of my GSU Student Government Association shirts, and as he pointed to my shirt he asked, "Do you work for di government?" I said, "No not the real government, just the Student Government at Georgia State University." He looked confused, and I realized I just used the words Georgia, State, Student, Government, and University to answer a simple Yes or No question.

The confused Mr. Patel said, "Hmmm... so you do work for di government?" Oh, my goodness! Seriously? I wasn't in the mood to give a lesson on the politics behind University funding and governance so I said, "Sort of. Student Government, yes."

Good ole' America, still the Melting Pot of the World.

Class Schedule - Spring 2010

For those who are interested, here is my class schedule for this (my final full undergrad) semester:

Corporate Finance

Monday: 4:30 PM - 7:15 PM

Negotiation
Tues. & Thurs: 9:30 AM - 10:45 AM

Operations Management
Tues. & Thurs: 11:00AM -12:15 PM

Entrepreneurship: New Venture Management
Tuesday: 7:15 PM - 9:45 PM

Aside from my semester in Australia, this will probably be one of my favorite semesters of my collegiate career. I'm excited!

Spagetti Results

Ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for... (drum roll please) the Mike Roach serious attempt at the world famous Grandpa Pete spaghetti sauce:

Not bad for a first attempt at unsupervised spaghetti sauce cooking. However, I do have a long way to go before duplicating Grandpa Pete's. I agree with my Uncle Pete's comment about the ever evasive Grandpa Pete.

I may just have to accept the fact that mine will never be as good. I'll just give mine the name, "Mike Roach's World Famous Attempt at his Grandpa Pete's World Famous Spaghetti Sauce Made from Scratch."

By the way, what is Scratch anyway? It seems to be getting inside all the good recipes.

Happy MLK Day!

No, that's not an abbreviation for Happy Milk Day. It is an abbreviation for Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day! I do find it strange that MLK Jr.'s birthday somehow always falls on a Monday. That musta stunk when, after a relaxing weekend, he had to go into work on his birthday. Do you think Martin Luther King Jr. ever called in sick on his Birthday-Monday?

In on slightly more serious note, I am taking some time to relax today and put to use one of my new favorite toys (I bought it for a steal of a deal from Ross for only 24.99): the BIG pot!

In order to properly christen the BIG pot, I am making (to my best recollection because he won't give a wrriten recipe) Grandpa Pete's world famous recipe for spaghetti sauce.

Full report on the results to follow!

Town Hall Meeting Report

Last night's "Stop the Violence" Town Hall was pretty good.

I wondered around for 15 minutes just trying to find the place. In my search, I came across the site of the 1945 Winecoff Hotel Fire. Which to this day, remains the deadlist hotel fire in US History. I'll do some research and write a blog entry about it. Had I not stopped to take pictures, it may have only taken me 10 minutes to find the Atlanta Central Library Auditorium.

Once I finally found the place, I could tell the turnout was a little less than anticipated. Probably about 25-35 people in attendance. Mayor Reed was in fact not present. However, Atlanta's City Council President, Caesar Mitchell was in attendance. He was the first guest speaker, and then left as soon as he was finished speaking. Typical political behavior.

There were some high-ranking APD officers and even GSUPD showed a presence. When the question was asked to the audience if any Student Government Association representatives were present, I raised my hand. Georgia Tech's Student Body President was on the other side of the auditorium, and we were both asked to come up and say a few words....only if we wanted.

I'm not one to decline an invitation, so I went to the podium and said a few words about how one of the first things I did when I took office (as the VP of Student Services) was meet with the GSUPD. I did this because one of the services the University offers to the students is, you guessed it... safety. I then took the info I received from the initial meeting with the GSUPD and compiled a report that I presented to our SGA Senate. I may see if I can dig up that report and post it to the blog.

Other speakers included students who were recent victims of crime on University campuses across Atlanta and the leader of an anti-bullying organization. He made the point that the individuals who commit these crime are "bullies with guns" and if we can get the bullying problems in schools under control, then we may be able to see a drop in crime. An interesting argument nonetheless.

"Stop the Violence" Town Hall Meeting

Tonight I have been invited to represent Georgia State University at a Town Hall Meeting called "Stop the Violence." It is hosted by the Community Teen Coalition, Inc. at 6:00 PM. It is going to take place at the Atlanta Central Library Auditorium.

I find it strange that the CTC website doesn't mention the event. I'm not sure what to expect, but according to the flier Atlanta's new Major (Kasim Reed) and Atlanta's City Council President (Ceasar Mitchell) are supposed to be present.

Full report to follow.

Blind Love

Yesterday afternoon's post about the unlonely professor reminded me of a story that my mom told me about my dad. And since there are a few degrees of separation between me and the original telling of the story, I'll do my best to get all the details correct.

A few years ago my dad's job with Northwest Airlines took him to Detroit, Michigan. In the beginning he commuted to Detroit from Atlanta, but eventually he rented an apartment. One day as he was walking through the airport, he saw a lady with a white cane come out of the women's restroom. She was obviously blind, hence the white cane. Then, she started calling a man's name (let's call him Bill). "Bill... Bill..."

Being the good Samaritan he is, my dad asked her, "Ma'am do you need some help?"

"Oh, thank you, but I'm just trying to find my husband," she said. "He just stepped into the restroom."

Before she even finished her sentence, a man with a white cane walked out of the men's restroom and began calling a woman's name (let's call her Jill). "Jill..."

The woman turned her head to the men's restroom. "I'm over here Bill," she answered. Turning back to my dad she said, "Thank you for your help sir, but I found him."

My dad stood in amazement as the blind couple, traveling together in a busy airport, walked down the terminal holding hands.

The Unlonely Professor

Just a forewarning: this gets pretty mean, but has a good message.

Before I went back to campus for my final class of the day, I needed to swing by my apartment for a quick bite. What's on the menu? Leftover chicken and dumplings from Mom... for the third evening in a row. Hey, you can't beat free food. Especially on a college kid's budget.

Before I heat up the leftovers, I had to get this story of my experience with a professor out of my mind and onto the blog. Out my of mind and onto the blog... seriously Mike? I think this blogging thing is doing something strange to me. Hey! There is a blog title right there, "I Think This Blogging Thing Is Doing Something Strange to Me." Kinda long, but I digress.

I had a class last night from 7:15 PM till 9:45PM. The class name: Optimal Resource Management. Sounds cool, right? Wrong. I quote from the course description: "This course focuses on optimization modeling and sensitivity analysis to help managers craft well-formed, well-justified decisions. Students design optimization models for realistic cases, implement them using spreadsheets, and write the results in the form of a nontechnical recommendation to management backed up by clearly organized technical appendices."

Here's my version, "This course is like that one last semester, remember the one you thought you were going to barely pass, but for some reason the teacher gave you a B. Business Analysis? Yeah that one. Well this class is like that one but ON STEROIDS! Oh, that's not bad enough? After you do all that spreadsheet modeling, technical work, and pulling your hair out (if you had some), you then need to present it in a manner that a second grader can understand."

There were only five people in the class, so apparently I was the only one who didn't get the memo that this was, in fact, not a "cool class." Maybe if I had read the course description before registering for the class this wouldn't have happened. Wow, what an idea! Lesson learned. It only took me 3.5 years. Some lessons I guess are learned the hard way.

The professor said there were so few students because this was a "protected class" because it was part of the University's "critical thinking through writing initiative." Great! By that time I had a pretty good list of reasons to drop this class.

Let me take a minute to describe the professor to you. He had a beard. (As all good professor's should. I think even female professors should start growing them. It helps add to their legitimacy.) But not just any beard, his was borderline burlesque, unkempt, Old Man Time lookin'. It was unattractive. He spoke very slow and told jokes that weren't very funny. My favorite was, "I think the reason I like linear programming is because we are both the same age (Long awkward pause) We were both born in 1942."

Additionally, he was at least 150-200 lbs overweight but not in a jolly Santa Claus way. He was overweight in awkward locations. For example, he looked normal from the shoulders up, but the rest of his body was very shapely. And when he sat down his belt buckle was about six inches below his chin (at least that's where I thought his chin was). He was obviously was going for the overweight Steve Urkel look.

But wait, there's more! Not too long into the class the professor informed us he was legally blind. Which explained the two sets of coke-bottle thickness glasses that he switched between, and why he had to have his face (even with the glasses on, seriously not joking) four to six inches from the screen! Seriously?

He suggested since the class had so few people to just blurt out questions if we had any because he probably wouldn't see our raised hands anyway. Now at this point, I just started to feel sorry for the guy. I thought, 'This must be a lonely dude, and the true reason he likes linear programming is because he doesn't have many friends.' Terrible, I know. But there was no way I was going to be able to make it through this class. Not with the subject material and definitely not with this guy teaching it.

Convinced I was going to drop the class (don't worry Mom I don't need it to graduate), I tuned out about halfway through. I couldn't leave early there was only four of us in the class by this point. But the more I sat and watched this guy, the more I felt sorry for him. It really made me appreciate my health and wellbeing. And as he was rambling on about how many painted widgets and gadgets we should make, I realized... he had on a wedding ring.

Wow! This guy, who has so much going against him, still managed to find someone to fall in love with and get married. That is really cool! Unless of course he managed to find a mail-order bride. Or he thinks he actually looks like Fabio, and only wears a wedding ring to keep all the ladies off him (because he's legally blind... get it?).

But seriously... all I really want to say through this story is this:

Thank goodness Love is blind. It has helped a heck of a lot of people get through this thing called Life.

Graduating to New Heights - Terrance Rogers

Congratulations to the Birthday Boy Terrance Rogers!

My colleague and friend Terrance Rogers, has received a great birthday present from Georgia State University. He is featured today on the GSU homepage not because it's his birthday but because of his amazing story. In Terrance's words (from his Facebook profile), "I am first generation college student, in school to take care of those close to me in the future."

In the midst of the worst job market in recent years, Terrance has landed a job on Wall Street with one of the World’s largest financial institutions – Deutsche Bank. The best part is he hasn't even graduated yet! Here is a link to the entire article.

Congratulations and Happy Birthday Terrance! Your story is truly inspiring and amazing.

Whistle While You Work - President Obama Does

It has been argued that President Barack Hussein Obama is one of the best speakers in Modern History. BUT - Have you ever noticed how President Obama whistles while he "works."

Here is a short video that I cut together from President Obama's the Weekly Address (First delivered on October 24, 2009). The original video was 4 min. 10 sec. and none of the whistles were enhanced or repeated. Enjoy!

What's with the name?

In case some of you are wondering about the name of my new blog, I thought I would take a moment to explain. Here's the quick and dirty:

1. I needed my name in it - check!
2. I wanted to be able to seriously be.... well, me.
3. More often than not, I find myself looking at the World and saying "Seriously?"
4. I truly believe (and after much Googling I still can't find the original author), "Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of."
   

Don't worry. This isn't going to be a serious blog about serious issues. I'll have some serious things to say, but if anyone out there in the... what's it called again? the blogosphere? (not recognized by my spell checker) If anyone out there in the blogosphere knows anything about me, it is that I'm one of the first people to make fun of... well, anything.

I love to laugh! And hopefully this blog will allow me to share some of my laughter with the world!

PS: Aww... ain't that sweet? I took way too long trying get the wording right to end this post all sentimental-like, and here I am making fun of it. This'll be an interesting journey! :-)

Winter Weather in Atlanta

Last night Atlanta received a nice, little dusting of about half an inch of snow. It was nice to finally have some snow to justify this bitter cold.

It was also nice to watch the Georgian motorists try to maneuver the roadways. And if that weren't good enough, the best was watching a MARTA bus get stuck outside my parking garage.

Luckily, I made it into the parking garage not 20 minutes before this happened. I spoke to the MARTA bus driver and while on his cell phone he told me, "I am not going to drive 'dis. If day wan it, day can com git it!"

I was just happy to have already made it into the parking garage, and so I proceeded to go skiing on the bunny slope that is the top level of the parking garage.

Welcome to the New Blog!

Good morning everyone, and welcome to my new blog obviously entitled "Seriously Mike Roach"

I've decided to get back into blogging for a number of reasons (Most of which are selfish. But hey what human actions aren't influenced by some sort of self-rewarding motivation?). Some of you may remember about a year and a half ago I had a Travel Blog to document my adventures in Australia as I studied abroad. Well, I can't use that blog anymore because Mike's Travel Blog would be a bit of a misnomer as I have not been able to do much traveling lately. At least not on the scale of going half a world away for 4 months. One of these days I'll have some exciting adventures to publish on that blog, but until then this'll have to do.

On a lighter, less depressing note, my selfish reasons to get back into blogging include :

• It'll force me to think and read (I normally don't do much of either unless it is a life or death situation or I have an assignment for college).
• Thinking and reading are what smart people do (I hope blathering on about whatever I deem bather-worthy might help raise my IQ half a point).
• I wanted to hone my creative talents (finding something interesting enough to write about every day...... er, week..... fortnight......[I haven't yet decided how often I am going to blog, so cut me some slack] should be a fun creative challenge).
  
• I stumbled across a blog entry from one of my Uncle's favorite bloggers where he inspired people to Get Excited and Make Things. (Well Mr. Weaton, I am accepting your challenge!).
• I will hopefully become more self-aware of... well, myself.
  
• I hope to showcase some of my other projects (Video, photo, future businesses, etc).
  
• Last and certainly not least, I want to be as cool as my Uncle Pete (Uncle Pedro, you can hang your hat on being part of the inspiration behind this. BUT - you may wanna keep your hat on your head, I've noticed your hair ain't what it used to be. You don't want to get a sunburn. Believe me, a sunburn on your head isn't fun).
  

This should be fun. Now - just to figure out how to link this blog with Facebook.